LONELY at CHRISTMAS? Or – HAPPY one day, DEPRESSED the next? Do the holidays bring up all manner of emotion/MEMORIES? Talking about me here, of course, although at this particular moment I’m feeling not too bad about things. (But ask me again later today.) When I was a kid, Christmas was magical. My excitement was bubbling up, overflowing. All I had to do was receive; it was that blissfully ignorant time when I was unaware of any grown-up work that went into bringing a happy Christmas fantasy to life. As a child, it was all about Santa, presents and sweet treats.
Nowadays, the season often highlights what’s missing rather than what’s coming. I have no partner and no children. I live on disability income due to a chronic illness that’s been pretty debilitating. A difficult menopause has brought panic attacks, exhaustion, and emotional swings that make my head spin. A couple of days ago, I was feeling so sorry for myself that I imagined no one could feel as bad as me.
Suddenly during this moment of despair, I had a realization. I saw how lucky I am. I wasn’t “thinking positive”, or pasting a perky smile over the pain. I simply recognized .... (for more see "Posts" at www.patreon.com/innerdiamond Thank you! )